Aaj Mere Virus Ki Shaadi Hai, Yaaron

Aaj Mere Virus Ki Shaadi Hai, Yaaron

Virus spread far and wide, eliminating everything standing in her way. She was on a quest to eradicate. Annihilation was the sole condition.

It was a hard choice, not for her as she was just a virus, but for humanity. By infecting large batches of humans, she could prove her strength. Her virility would lead her to her raison d’etre, and her love, Viral.

Viral’s father, when asked for his son’s proverbial hand in marriage, had stormed.

“Who are you? You think you could stroll in and whisk my Viral away, did you? How will you take care of him? You aren’t virulent enough.”

He glared at her, oodles of scorn dripping.


“To survive, being a benign infection is not enough,” he had stormed.


Then came his ultimatum. 


“Don’t return till you have proven you are worthy of asking my son’s protrusion in marriage.”


Insulted, she knew to win over Viral’s annoying father was to be as virulent as ever. So she planned and plotted. The solution came to her. A pandemic. It was the ultimate in viral infections. Persevering, she accomplished her goal in a year or so. Her malignancy was a proven fact –an undeniable truth.


Patting herself on her non-existent back and smiling with sheer evil and anticipation, she danced to the ghodi. Her loud and gregarious baraat awaited her. At Viral’s house, his father stood outside. His countenance, grim. He held a vial, aloft.


“Where do you think you are going?” the vial screeched.

“I am going to marry Viral,” she said, breezily.

Viral peeked from the gates, melting her heart.

“Hello? I don’t think so. You have failed to meet the condition,” the bottle thundered.

“I have proved I am the best.”

“Your best is in the past. Look at me, Virus! I’m a vaccine, your mortal enemy. My name is Go-Corona-Go, and I’m here to strip you of your virulence,” Go-Corona-Go said.

A grin tore Father’s face into two halves.

Virus guffawed. “You? You can’t stop me. Me? I brought the whole world to its knees.”

Her glee was evident.

“What can I say? Try me.” Go-Corona-Go smiled, pleased with the pun.

Virus’ rage began to rise. Her eyes bugged out with her face turning purple. She started bloating and then burst. Her anger manifested itself into many avatars of her, all deadly.

“Your vaccine can’t control me. I am invincible.” 

Her manifestations agreed, with reverence.

Viral cowered in fear. Virus smiled with assurance at him, and he responded with a tentative smile.

Go-Corona-Go’s angelic face yawned. “Whatever. I can control your …mutations, and you.”

“You think you can. We will escape your claws!”

“I highly doubt that.” Go-Corona-Go examined her nails. Butter wouldn’t melt in her mouth, literally. 

“Bah humbug! Viral is ready to marry me, aren’t you?” Virus asked Viral.

Viral was a deer-trapped-in-headlights. He looked fearfully at Father.

“Viral?” asked Virus.

Viral lowered his head.

“Viral!” she cried, defeated. Her avatars merging into her.

Go-Corona-Go smiled in triumph.
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