Dad, I don’t hate you

Dad…

I recall our last conversation, a year after the court’s verdict…

“Please don’t hate me, beta.”

“Dad, Stop calling!” I had yelled.

“Don’t you ever try to reach me again!”

I had banged the phone.

The ‘Bitter Arguments!’

The ‘Misunderstandings!’

The ‘Divorce!’

Your teen son was hurt and blamed you entirely for the acrimony and saw you through my “MOM’S EYES.”

Marriage was an unhappy union for you two! But Dad, you had stayed for a decade solely for me as the price of leaving your beloved son seemed too dear.

But the evermore emotional abuse and pain became more than you could bear and you failed to face it all.

Dad, you divorced my Mom! but, you endured all the intense criticism and kept your side of the story to yourself.!

….And your beloved son divorced you!

Now that I am older and more mature, it’s time, I must try travelling back, putting aside how I felt then, and want to imagine myself in your place!

Now I know that you too were an important casualty of a family breakdown, who was left alone with the precious memories of your loving son.

Dad,

There was so much bitterness ratcheted by the divorce, probably I failed to understand then your emotional bond.

As the custody was with Mom, she had enough opportunities to share her stories of experiences with you.

Now that I am a Dad, I want to be compassionate and be in touch again.

I recall our last conversation….you told me so…

I know Dad, it’s taken me a very long time to realize this…

…that I want to reach out to you, for you to know that I don’t hate you!

Dad,

May I?
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Pratiksha Bhogle

Pratiksha is an evolving blogger who writes for Momspresso, in English and Marathi. She also writes at Women's Web.
Pratiksha Bhogle

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