I feel a little awkward writing this, I guess it’s my first. It’s been years since Ma left us, guess she kept us connected. I should say I haven’t been a very good daughter, limiting our conversations to just cell phone messages. Sorry.
Last night, your granddaughter shouted loud, that she hates me. I reflected about it all night, I have come to understand certain things, hence this letter…
Since the time I remember, I was never your Princess. It was Ma all the time for me, only her. All my childhood memories of you have been of a strict disciplinarian, somebody who reprimanded me all the time, rather than pampering. All my friends would brag about their dear daddies. I have to say, I feared you.
I remember how you picked a fight with anyone who broke rules or acted inappropriately. Ma would request you to compromise, but you never bowed down. I was on Ma’s side always, your obstinacy irritated me.
Now, my daughter says I’m too harsh. Her father spoils her no end and her dadi dotes on her. Of late, she’s been throwing a lot of tantrums and getting her way. So, for some time now, I have taken control, someone must draw the line.
At the workplace, except my close friends, people find me difficult. I come across as unfriendly, they keep their distance.t Now I know, it’s not Ma, it’s you I’ve been listening to.
My daughter is angry, but I know she’ll realize I loved her all the time, just like I realized last night. And like you, I adhere to principles, don’t indulge in gossip or politics, so they hate me. But that’s their problem.
It’s Father’s Day this weekend, I’ll visit you. Let’s talk, it’s about time.
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She has published her short stories in many anthologies and she is a regular blogger at Momspresso and Women's Web.