Reality Check: Now or Never

“Abhi, come here. Why don’t you listen and remember anything?  It’s your 11th birthday next week but still same callous and irresponsible behaviour. I am fed up of both of you”, blabbered Amita before slamming the door hard.  The anger, the scoldings had now become a routine and a part of everyday in Amita’s house.

Forty year old Amita was a patient and cal person except when it came to her children. She being herself a responsible child when young, expected same kind of tepid attitude from  both kids; Abhi and Alia. Though twins, both didn’t share any similarity except the love for chocolates and ‘careless’ attitude. The latter irked Amita quite a lot. This tussle was almost since last five years!

She never tried to realise and remember the calm and composed attitude of her parents, while they handled her when she was young. She just wanted her kids to be like her. When they didn’t meet her even a trivial expectation, she would just blast on them taking out all her frustration on them. No later, kids started avoiding her and longed for their mom to stay out of the house. They had started disliking her for the short tempered attitude.

Amita did realise her fault and would often regret her behaviour. She would promise herself to be calm next time but all the promises would prove futile the next moment. Very soon, “ Alia, why didn’t you hang your towel?” followed by screaming would come up.

Not only the children, her husband was wary of her impatient behaviour. He was pissed off with her and the resulting arguments between husband and wife would end up the day.

One fine day, something happened; something that changed her outlook. Amita’s mother sent her a video on Wtsapp. When she saw that 2 minute video, she couldn’t hold back her tears. It was an almost seven year old recording where the then young and small Alia and Abhi were seen playing and chirping with their parents, in a bubbly and happy mood. The laughter and innocence were something that left Amita asking for more such moments. But she realised they would never come back. Amita replayed the video; she continued doing that. She wished , could she fly back to the past and relive those moments with a loving Abhi and doting Alia. Alas! She could not. The reality hit upon her that in pursuit of making them disciplined and well behaved, she had somewhere lost them. All she had was the present day. It was time for the reality check; she had understood that ‘ now or never’. It hit upon her that present time will become past as well and to get back closer to her kids, she needed to win them with her love not the anger and strictness.

               “ Bhaiya, give me two Cornetto icecreams”, Amita told the shopkeeper.

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Pooja Gupta

Pooja Gupta is a clinical microbiologist by profession based in Bathinda, Punjab. Her encounter with the pen is a recent one and since then she became completely addicted to it.

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