It was Filomena Mascarhanes’ 85th birthday. But there were no roses!

In fact, it had been ages since she received roses on her birthday.  Her husband, Aphonso, had passed on almost 10 years ago and her kids had left home even earlier.

For a few years after the kids left, a bouquet of yellow and blue flowers would arrive promptly on the morning of her birthday. Her children knew how she loved yellow and blue. Just like the little street they lived on! The one tucked behind Rua 31 in Fontainhas, Goa. But this little practice soon fell by the wayside as the kids got busier.

In Filomena’s street, the occupants of the homes had begun to look much older than the homes themselves.

“That was probably because the homes still got a coat of fresh paint every year, and there was no way the occupants could arrange the same for themselves!” Filomena chuckled when this thought crossed her mind.

Of course, when their children arranged their funerals, they usually also paid for some makeup for that one last photograph in the casket.

Filomena often thought about her casket and the dress she would wear.

“What else is left for me to look forward to?”, Filomena would mutter to herself.  

So, on the morning of her birthday, Filomina struggled out of bed, hobbled to the bathroom, brushed her dentures, and began her day. 

Morning cuppa in hand, she turned the radio on and settled herself next to her window. A gentle breeze played with the lace curtains and made them pat Filomena’s cheek.

“Yes, thank you, Chantilly you never forget, do you?”

After Afonso’s passing, Filomena had started talking to all the inanimate things around her. They, like her, seemed to be blessed with a longer life span than ideal. So, the radio was now christened Phillip, her rocking chair was called Elvis, her dentures were Mr and Mrs Chatterji and Chantilly- her lace curtains!

Phillip played ‘Moon River’ while Elvis rocked Filomena’s world.

This was her comfort zone. And here is where she would wait for the Grim Reaper. 

“Wait, what was that bright blue thing outside old Gomez’s door today?”

She put on her spectacles and peered intently.

“Lord, have mercy! Is Gomez out of his rocker?”

“He’s gone and bought himself a new Lambretta?”

No one visited him ever. Nasty old bugger barked at anyone who came near his door. No one dared park their vehicle in front of his gate, so what was that gizmo doing there?

Phillip crooned “..two drifters off to see the world… such a lot of world to see…”

“Phillip!! I know what you’re trying!”, she threw her radio a stern glance.

But Phillip was a blabbermouth!

“When was the last time you did something for the first time?” a male voice urged for Goa Tourism.

Something stirred inside Filomena.

“When was the last time you did something for the first time, Fil?” She asked herself.

Her old eyes twinkled. In her situation, what’s the worst that could happen?

Her heart raced like a little girl’s.  A mischievous idea propelled her to get up, cross the street and circle the Lambretta like a curious cat.

“C’mon girl, ride me”- the Lambretta seemed to drawl in Aphonso’s voice!

She giggled.

And before she knew it, she was astride the scooter, her cottony hair billowing in the wind like wisps of clouds flying free and unchained on Rua 31.

She could hear Gomez hobbling behind and barking profanities, but she felt great speeding… at 20 km/hr just before running straight into the coconut tree outside Confeitaria!

Mr and Mrs Chatterji flew out of her mouth and landed on the steps of the bakery.

The normally susegad crowd gathered and fussed around this old lady in a nighty, helping her up and fending off Gomez!

“I’m offay! No woffies!” said the toothless and breathless Filomena.

“It’s my birffay!” she beamed.

So, on her 85th birthday, Filomena was helped into the bakery where she spent a good few hours being fussed over and admonished. (Everyone loves a kooky old lady with gumption!) They found it funny, even admirable, that an old lady would dare to steal a bike and ride into town to buy herself her birthday cake!

As she blew the candles out, strangers turned well-wishers said that they would make sure that this was the last time she did something like this for the first time!