Gayatri’s Turmoil

Knock-knock (the door knocked)

Gayatri removed her reading glasses to wipe her tears before she could assertively utter, "Come in." Her eyes, too honest, confessed the truth before her lips could cover it through fake words. "Didi, what happened? Did he call again?", asked the caring helper. "Na na Dada. I was reading a book and a passage from it... Never mind, tell me why you came knocking", Gayatri tried to change the topic. "I made your favorite mutton alani, just like Amma had taught me to make. I followed her recipe. Please come down and have it, it is a request." Gayatri looked at the frame on her table, it had her mother's picture. She picked it up and kissed it. She turned towards the door, and looked at him in awe, "What would I do without you, Kishore Dada? I did not know I needed it. I am coming down, after you."

Gayatri stayed on the first floor of a book cafe in Palampur. Her love for books made her do this. Kishore had been the chef at his mom's place, the only trustworthy person she had in her life. Rest had shown their colors in a way that she did not have any other option but to cut them off from her life permanently. She could not keep in touch with her friends, so no one from that end. Her relatives, her immediate family had warned her before she got married. They had warned her, they were not in agreement with the union of these two. They had already started looking for a suitable boy for her, but she was in love with Pradeep. So she decided to quit the family and marry Pradeep. After she got separated from Pradeep, society already had a judgment of a bad wife for her. That is the reason why she chose Palampur, a place far from Mumbai, where there was no possibility of encountering people who knew her.

She licked the soup bowl till its last drop, her face exhibited content. After so many years, Kishore Dada could understand and sense that in her. He did not spoil her mood by asking about the reason for her crying. "It's late Madam. Please have your medicines and let us call it a day." Gayatri thanked him with a smile, "Good night Dada", and headed to her bedroom. Kishore went off to sleep the moment he lay on the bed.

The next morning, Gayatri woke up and did yoga according to her schedule. She grabbed the newspaper with a cup of chai. She used to have a calm and slow morning because once the cafe opened she had to be on her toes. "Bookworm Brew" was the only book cafe in the town and the collection of the books was unique. Plus, Kishore Dada ensured the best coffee and hospitality, so the crowd was automatically drawn to the place.

But today was special. The Readers Of Palanpur - a group of local readers had their first-ever meet-up scheduled. Hence, Kishore Dada had to stock up on more grocery supplies as additional footfall was predicted, more than the regular, was expected. Now you got it, freshness of ingredients was their USP. It was 11, the cafe opening time. Gayatri stepped down in an Ajrakh anarkali. She paired it with classy oxidized jewelry. The cafe visitors had already started pouring in and couldn't help but notice the charming owner of the cafe.

Gayatri greeted the early visitors with a warm smile, her eyes sparkling with a mix of excitement and nervousness. The Readers of Palampur were a diverse group, ranging from young students to elderly retirees, all united by their love for literature. As the cafe filled with the hum of conversations and the aroma of freshly brewed coffee, Gayatri felt a sense of fulfillment. This was her dream coming to life.

Kishore Dada, ever the diligent helper, moved swiftly between the kitchen and the cafe floor, ensuring that every guest was attended to. He occasionally glanced at Gayatri, who was now engaged in a lively discussion with a group of readers about the latest bestseller. Her laughter echoed through the room, a stark contrast to the tears she had shed the previous night.

As the meet-up progressed, Gayatri found herself drawn into a deep conversation with an elderly gentleman named Mr. Sharma. He was a retired professor with a wealth of knowledge about Indian literature. They discussed everything from Rabindranath Tagore to contemporary authors, and Gayatri felt a connection she hadn't experienced in a long time.

Meanwhile, Kishore Dada noticed a young man standing awkwardly near the entrance, clutching a book to his chest. He approached him with a friendly smile. "Welcome to Bookworm Brew. Can I help you with something?"

The young man hesitated before speaking. "I... I heard about the meet-up and thought I’d join. But I’m not sure if I belong here."

Kishore Dada patted him on the back. "Nonsense! Everyone who loves books belongs here. Come, let me introduce you to Gayatri Madam."

As Kishore led the young man towards Gayatri, she looked up and smiled warmly. "Hello, I’m Gayatri. What’s your name?"

"Ravi," he replied, his voice barely above a whisper.

"Nice to meet you, Ravi. What book are you reading?" she asked, genuinely interested.

Ravi's face lit up as he began to talk about his favorite book. Gayatri listened intently, making him feel valued and welcomed. The rest of the meet-up went smoothly, with readers sharing their thoughts and recommendations, and the cafe buzzing with intellectual energy.

By the end of the day, Gayatri felt a sense of accomplishment. The meet-up had been a success, and she had made new friends who shared her passion for books. As she closed the cafe for the night, she reflected on the day's events. The past might claw its way out, but today had shown her that the present could be just as powerful, if not more so.

She headed to her bedroom, feeling a sense of peace she hadn't felt in a long time. As she drifted off to sleep, she knew that no matter what the future held, she had found her sanctuary in the pages of her books and the walls of her beloved cafe.

Gayatri grabbed the same book that made her cry the previous night and the bookmark led to the same page and passage where she left it. it read, “I remember the precise moment, crouching behind a crumbling mud wall, peeking into the alley near the frozen creek. That was a long time ago, but it's wrong what they say about the past, I've learned about how you can bury it. Because the past claws its way out.” 

She kept thinking to herself, that there was something about that passage, she could not go beyond it. Reading it multiple times gave her an undefined content. 

Gayatri's reflection on the passage from the book brought back memories of the torment she endured in her past, particularly the abuse from Pradeep. This passage, which speaks about the inescapable nature of the past, resonates with her deeply. It reminds her of the pain and suffering she went through, and how those memories continue to affect her, even as she tries to move forward with her life.

“If you find yourself reflecting on painful memories from your past, it might be helpful to focus on the positive aspects of your present life and the supportive relationships you have”, Gayatri noted in her diary

The days at Bookworm Brew continued to be filled with the aroma of freshly brewed coffee, the rustle of turning pages, and the hum of conversations about literature. Gayatri found solace in her routine, her interactions with the readers, and the comforting presence of Kishore Dada. However, the passage from the book she had been reading lingered in her mind, a constant reminder of her past.

Ravi became a frequent visitor to the cafe. Each time he walked in, Gayatri's heart would skip a beat. There was something about him that felt familiar, a connection she couldn't quite place. Ravi, on the other hand, found himself drawn to the warmth and tranquility of the cafe, and to Gayatri's nurturing presence.

One evening, as the cafe was winding down, Ravi approached Gayatri with a hesitant smile. "Gayatri Madam, can I talk to you for a moment?"

"Of course, Ravi. What's on your mind?" she replied, setting aside the book she had been reading.

Ravi took a deep breath, his eyes reflecting a mix of anxiety and determination. "I... I need to tell you something about my past. It's something I've been carrying with me for a long time."

Gayatri's heart pounded in her chest. She gestured for him to sit down and took a seat across from him. "Go on, Ravi. I'm listening."

Ravi began to speak, his voice trembling slightly. "My mother left when I was very young. My father was... not a good man. He was abusive, and my mother couldn't take it anymore. She left, but she couldn't take me with her. I've always wondered what happened to her if she ever thought about me."

Gayatri's eyes widened, her breath catching in her throat. She reached out and placed a comforting hand on Ravi's. "Ravi, I... I think I know who your mother is."

Ravi looked at her, confusion and hope mingling in his eyes. "You do?"

Gayatri nodded, tears welling up in her eyes. "Ravi, I am your mother."

The words hung in the air, heavy with emotion. Ravi stared at her, his mind struggling to process the revelation. "You... you're my mother?"

Gayatri nodded again, tears streaming down her face. "Yes, Ravi. I left because I couldn't bear the abuse any longer. I wanted to take you with me, but I couldn't. I've thought about you every single day since then."

Ravi's eyes filled with tears as well. He reached out and embraced Gayatri, holding her tightly. "I missed you so much, Mom."

"I missed you too, my son," Gayatri whispered, her voice choked with emotion.

Kishore Dada, who had been watching from a distance, wiped a tear from his eye. He approached them and placed a hand on Ravi's shoulder. "Welcome home, Ravi."

The reunion was bittersweet, filled with tears and laughter, as mother and son shared their stories and caught up on the years they had lost. Gayatri felt a sense of completeness she hadn't felt in a long time. The past had indeed clawed its way out, but it had brought with it a chance for healing and new beginnings.

From that day on, Ravi became an integral part of Bookworm Brew. He helped Gayatri and Kishore Dada with the cafe, and the three of them formed a close-knit family. The cafe continued to thrive, not just as a place for book lovers, but as a sanctuary for those seeking solace and connection.

/Gayatri's love for Pradeep during their college days was intense, but it was marred by possessiveness and abuse. Despite warnings from those around her, she was too deeply in love to see the difference between genuine care and unhealthy possessiveness. This led to a tumultuous relationship that left lasting scars on her heart and mind.

Ravi's journey to find Gayatri began in Mumbai. He started by reaching out to Gayatri's brother, who denies knowing her. Undeterred, Ravi then contacts her friends using some contact numbers and addresses he finds in his father's diary. This leads him to learn about a reading event at a book cafe in Palampur. Upon seeing a picture of the cafe owner, he decides to book tickets to Palampur.

Gayatri's heart was finally at peace. She had found her son, and together, they had found a way to move forward, leaving the shadows of the past behind. The love and bond they shared were a testament to the resilience of the human spirit, and the power of hope and forgiveness.

-

Gayatri's life was once filled with dreams and hopes, but those dreams were shattered by the harsh reality of her marriage. Her husband, once a charming man, had turned into a monster under the influence of alcohol. Night after night, he would come home drunk, his eyes filled with rage. The physical abuse was relentless, and the mental torture was even worse. He would hurl accusations at her, calling her characterless, a woman of loose morals, and a keep who slept with multiple men.

Gayatri endured it all for the sake of her son. She believed that her love and sacrifice would provide him with a better future. But the constant abuse took its toll. One night, when her husband tried to touch her, she resisted. That was the breaking point. His accusations grew louder, more vicious. He called her names that made her skin crawl. The emotional pain became unbearable, and she found herself hating her son, the very reason she had endured so much.

One fateful day, Gayatri decided she could take no more. She packed a small bag with her meager belongings and left her home, her son, and her past behind. She had no plan, no destination, just a desperate need to escape the torment.

Through a neighbor from her native place, she heard about Kishore. Kishore was a kind-hearted man who had faced his share of hardships. He had no family and earned his living through daily labor, often sleeping on the streets. Despite his struggles, he had a reputation for helping those in need.

Her sister-in-law insulted Kishore and tried to belittle his efforts. But Gayatri stood by him, finding strength in their shared struggles. Together, they built a new life, one page at a time.

Gayatri sought him out, hoping to find some solace. When she found him, she saw a man who, despite his circumstances, had a spark of hope in his eyes. With her little savings, Gayatri, alone, with a heart full of dreams and a mind brimming with ideas, had always envisioned a cozy book café where people could escape the hustle and bustle of daily life. Her dream was not just about creating a business; it was about crafting a sanctuary for book lovers, a place where stories came alive and conversations flowed as smoothly as the coffee.

However, the path to realizing her dream was fraught with challenges.

The first hurdle was securing a location. Gayatri spent countless hours scouring the city for the perfect spot. She needed a place that was accessible yet affordable, cozy yet spacious enough to accommodate her vision. After weeks of searching, she finally found a quaint little corner shop that seemed perfect.

Next came the challenge of transforming the space. Gayatri had a clear vision of what she wanted – warm wooden shelves lined with books. But turning that vision into reality required funds she didn’t have.

Despite these obstacles, Gayatri pressed on. She spent her evenings researching affordable ways to furnish the café, scouring second-hand stores for hidden gems, and learning the art of brewing the perfect cup of coffee.

It was a modest start, but it was hers. She poured her heart into the café, finding solace in the pages of the books and the quiet company of Kishore.

/

Ravi liked it in Palampur. He had never been so close to nature to date, only local trains and kaali-peeli taxis, honking horns, and screeching of train track friction consumed all of his day. Now, in the silence of the quaint place he could listen to his heartbeats and desires.

Gayatri, on the other hand, used to feel guilty about not being with her son during his growing years. The guilt crawled on her nerves every night, stole her sleep, and left her restless every morning. One morning she finally gathers courage to speak to Ravi about her feelings. They say coffee makes conversation easy, so she walked towards Ravi with two cups of coffee, one for herself and the other for him.

"Hi Ravi,

I know this is a difficult time for both of us, and I want to be honest with you about why I had to leave when you were younger. Your father and I were in a very toxic and abusive relationship. It was a situation that was harmful not just to me, but potentially to you as well.

Living in that environment was incredibly damaging. I was constantly afraid and felt powerless. I realized that staying in that marriage would not only destroy me but also affect you negatively. Children who grow up in abusive households often carry deep emotional scars, and I didn't want that for you.

Leaving was one of the hardest decisions I've ever made. I thought about you every single day. I hoped that by leaving, I could find a way to create a safer and healthier environment for both of us. Unfortunately, circumstances didn't allow me to be with you sooner, but please know that my love for you has never wavered.

I understand if you have mixed feelings or if you're angry and confused. I'm here to answer any questions you have and to support you in any way I can. I hope that we can start to build a relationship based on understanding and trust.

I love you very much, and I'm deeply sorry for any pain my absence has caused you."

/

Ravi had always been a keen observer. At seventeen, he was mature beyond his years, a trait that had developed from having a broken family through childhood. He could only imagine Gayatri navigating the turbulent waters of life, all alone. Gayatri lived alone for as long as Ravi could remember. Now, as he stood on the cusp of adulthood, Ravi was determined to see his mother happy.

It was a crisp autumn afternoon when Ravi first noticed Prakash. The man, in his mid-forties, had come to the local café for a book launch. Ravi couldn't help but notice how Prakash's eyes would light up whenever Gayatri was around. Prakash found reasons to strike up conversations with her, whether it was about the book he was about to launch or the weather outside.

Ravi's curiosity was piqued. He decided to take matters into his own hands and arranged to meet Prakash for coffee one day. They met at a different café, and Ravi got straight to the point.

"Mr. Prakash, I've noticed you talking to my mother quite a bit. What are your intentions?" Ravi asked, his tone polite but firm.

Prakash smiled, a hint of nervousness in his eyes. "Ravi, I admire your directness. The truth is, I like your mother. She's a remarkable woman, and I'd like to get to know her better."

Ravi studied Prakash for a moment. There was sincerity in his eyes, and Ravi felt a glimmer of hope. "My mother has been through a lot. She deserves to be happy. If you genuinely care for her, I won't stand in your way."

Over the next few weeks, Prakash continued to visit the café, and his interactions with Gayatri became more frequent. Ravi watched from the sidelines, hoping that his mother would find the happiness she deserved. However, when Prakash finally mustered the courage to ask Gayatri out on a date, she hesitated.

"Prakash, I appreciate your interest, but I'm afraid of what society will say. I'm a single mother, and people can be judgmental," Gayatri confessed, her voice tinged with worry.

Prakash reached out and gently held her hand. "Gayatri, I understand your concerns, but we can't live our lives based on what others think. We deserve to be happy."

Gayatri's eyes filled with tears, and she pulled her hand away. "I need some time to think about this."

Ravi knew his mother well enough to understand her fears. That evening, he sat down with her for a heart-to-heart conversation.

"Mom, I know you're worried about what people will say, but you deserve to be happy. You've spent your entire life in fear and trauma. It's time for you to live for yourself," Ravi said, his voice filled with conviction.

Gayatri looked at her son, her eyes brimming with tears. "Ravi, I don't know if I can do this. What if it doesn't work out?"

"Mom, life is full of uncertainties, but that shouldn't stop you from taking a chance at happiness. Prakash seems like a good man, and he genuinely cares for you. Give him a chance," Ravi urged.

Gayatri took a deep breath, her mind racing with thoughts. Ideally, a mother puts her child's needs before her own, but now, her son is encouraging her to take a leap of faith. After a long moment of silence, she nodded.

"Okay, Ravi. I'll give it a try," she said, her voice trembling with emotion.

With Ravi's support, Gayatri agreed to go on a date with Prakash. They met at a cozy little restaurant, and as the evening progressed, Gayatri found herself relaxing in Prakash's company. He was kind, attentive, and genuinely interested in her life. For the first time in years, Gayatri felt a spark of happiness.

As weeks turned into months, Gayatri and Prakash's relationship blossomed. They spent time together, sharing their hopes and dreams, and slowly, Gayatri's fears began to dissipate. Ravi watched with a sense of fulfillment, knowing that his mother was finally finding the happiness she deserved.

One evening, as they sat together in the living room, Prakash turned to Gayatri and took her hand in his. "Gayatri, I love you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. Will you marry me?"

Gayatri's heart skipped a beat. She looked at Prakash, then at Ravi, who was watching them with a hopeful smile. Tears filled her eyes as she nodded. "Yes, Prakash. I will."

The news of their engagement spread quickly, and while there were some whispers and raised eyebrows, Gayatri chose to focus on the love and support she received from those who mattered most. Ravi stood by her side, his heart swelling with pride and happiness.

The wedding was a simple yet beautiful affair, attended by close friends and family. As Gayatri walked down the aisle, her eyes met Ravi's, and they shared a moment of understanding. This was a new beginning, not just for Gayatri, but for their entire family.

In the months that followed, Gayatri and Prakash settled into their new life together. They faced challenges, as all couples do, but their love and commitment to each other saw them through. Ravi, too, found a sense of peace and contentment, knowing that his mother was finally happy.

One evening, as they sat together on the porch, watching the sunset, Gayatri turned to Ravi and said, "Thank you, my son. You've given me the greatest gift of all – the chance to be happy."

Ravi smiled, his heart full of love for his mother. "You deserve it, Mom. You deserve all the happiness in the world."

Ravi sat at the small wooden table in his favorite corner of the campus café, the aroma of freshly brewed coffee mingling with the scent of old books from the nearby shelves. He was deep in thought, his fingers tracing the rim of his coffee cup. Prakash and Gayatri had asked to meet him here, sensing that he had something important on his mind.

Prakash, always the practical one, leaned forward. "Ravi, we have known you for years, and we care about you. We just want to understand your plans for the future. You're about to graduate with a degree in hotel management. What do you see yourself doing?"

Ravi smiled, appreciating their concern. "I know exactly what I want," he began, his voice steady and filled with conviction. "I want to settle down and run a café. Just one café. I don't have any grand ambitions to expand into a chain or anything like that. I want a place where people can come to enjoy good food and great literature. A place where they can feel at home."

Gayatri, ever the romantic, couldn't help but smile. "That sounds wonderful, Ravi. But what about settling down in the traditional sense? Marriage, family, all that?"

Ravi shook his head gently. "For me, settling down doesn't mean getting married. I might find love someday, but I'm not keen to get married. My focus is on creating a space that brings joy to people through food and books. That's what will make me feel settled and content."

Prakash raised an eyebrow. "But running a café is a lot of work. Are you sure you want to do this alone?"

Ravi nodded. "I've thought about it a lot. I know it won't be easy, but it's my passion. I want to create a place where people can escape from their daily lives, even if just for a little while. A place where they can find comfort in a good meal and a good book."

Gayatri leaned back in her chair, her eyes dreamy. "I can already picture it. A cozy little café with shelves full of books, soft music playing in the background, and the smell of freshly baked pastries in the air. It sounds like a dream."

Ravi's eyes sparkled with excitement. "Exactly! I want to spread my love for food and literature. I want people to come in and feel like they're stepping into a different world, a world where they can relax and be themselves."

Prakash, ever the realist, couldn't help but voice his concerns. "But what about the financial aspect? Running a café isn't cheap. Have you thought about how you'll manage the costs?"

Ravi nodded again. "I've been saving up, and I plan to take out a small business loan if necessary. I've also been working on a detailed business plan to make sure I have everything covered. I know it will be challenging, but I'm ready for it."

Gayatri reached across the table and squeezed Ravi's hand. "We believe in you, Ravi. And we'll be here to support you every step of the way."

Ravi felt a surge of gratitude for his parents. "Thank you, both of you. Your support means the world to me."

As the conversation continued, Ravi's vision for his café became clearer. He imagined a quaint little space with mismatched furniture, walls adorned with artwork from local artists, and shelves filled with books of all genres. He would serve a variety of dishes, from hearty breakfasts to light lunches and decadent desserts, all made with love and care. There would be a special corner for book readings and poetry nights, where people could come together to share their love for literature.

Ravi knew that his journey wouldn't be easy, but he was determined to make his dream a reality. He wanted to create a place where people could find solace and inspiration, a place where they could connect with others and with themselves. And with the support of his family, he knew he could do it.

Months passed, and Ravi graduated with his degree in hotel management. He wasted no time in putting his plan into action. He found a small, charming space in a quiet neighborhood and began the process of transforming it into his dream café. He spent countless hours painting the walls, arranging the furniture, and stocking the shelves with books. He poured his heart and soul into every detail, making sure that the café reflected his vision and passion.

Finally, the day came when Ravi's café was ready to open its doors. He named it "The Literary Café," a nod to his love for both food and literature. On the opening day, Prakash and Gayatri were there, along with many other friends and well-wishers. The café was filled with laughter, conversation, and the delicious aroma of freshly brewed coffee and baked goods.

As Ravi looked around at the smiling faces and the cozy atmosphere he had created, he felt a deep sense of fulfillment. This was his dream come true, and he was ready to share it with the world. He knew that there would be challenges ahead, but he was confident that he could overcome them with determination and the support of his friends.

Over time, The Literary Café became a beloved spot in the neighborhood. Ravi hosted book readings, poetry nights, and even writing workshops, creating a vibrant community of food and literature lovers.

Ravi's life had found his purpose and was living his dream. He continued to spread love for food and literature, one cup of coffee and one book at a time. And though he never sought out marriage, he found love in the connections he made with the people who visited his café. In his way, Ravi had settled down, the way he wanted.

And so, The Literary Café thrived, a testament to Ravi's passion and dedication. It was a place where people could come to escape, to find comfort, and to be inspired. For Ravi, a dream that he had turned into reality with love, hard work, and the unwavering support of his friends. They continued their journey as a family, bound by love, resilience, and the unwavering belief that happiness is always worth fighting for.

Life comes in a full circle. Gayatri, after escaping from an abusive, toxic marriage ended up opening a cafe. The cafe had become the purpose of her life. With Ravi, the responsibility was shared. After she met Prakash and they decided to get married, she handed over the cafe to Kishore Dada. He runs the cafe and reaches out to his Gayatri Madam whenever he needs any help. Gayatri and Prakash choose Bookworm Brew for their dates once in a while. Kishore also welcomes them with his warm hospitality and a warm bowl of Alani mutton soup.

About Ravi, he is happy in his world now. The trauma he faced in childhood left an everlasting mark on his mind-set. It made him too strong to depend on others for his happiness.