Nothing Lasts Forever
I was coming home from the first family function without Nikhil, memories of our short nine years of marriage flooded through me. I was already feeling a bit tipsy but made another drink.
We both worked for in a multinational company as software engineers and for three years previously accepted positions in Bengaluru office, a transfer we needed for any future advancements. A six-month training session for a promotion sent me to the New York office, I was not willing to go without Nikhil. Our Marriage Anniversary and Nikhil's birthday were around the corner. It was a big day for both of us as leap year comes once in four years. He encouraged me to go but before going he surprised me with a special romantic gateway to celebrate in advancement. It was the most beautiful surprise followed by a passionate lovemaking.
I completed three and a half months of training when my session was cut short by the news of a bomb ripping through the building in Bengaluru city. My Nikhil was in that building. My world crashed and a nightmare began for me. Hearing the news of the explosion, and Nikhil’s demise, I fainted. My colleagues rushed me to the hospital. The doctors told me I suffered a miscarriage. I was not even aware I was pregnant. Within minutes, both happiness left my life, leaving behind a deep void.
I went into depression. Everyday seems like a lifetime without any hope. Everything reminded me of his presence, my family got me transferred to Delhi office. For six months I remained like a ghost of my former self. I was living in a trans doing all normal activities without any sense or knowledge. Like every hope diminishes from my life with him.
I opened my bleary eyes when the cat, all seven pounds of squirming flesh, climbed onto my belly. Squinting into the sunlight streaming in from the open window, I discovered that I was now the weary possessor of a pounding headache, and at some point, had managed to lose both a tooth and a spouse. Tom the ginger cat was gifted to me by Nikhil on my birthday. My thoughts started flowing to the day when Nikhil’s name was introduced in my life.
When Nikhil and I first met, he was acting as a bartender in a summer weekend party at a friend's place, we hit it of instantly whole evening we indulge in light flirtation, next morning on patio he was putting together a tape of love songs titled “evergreen love”, gleaned from albums and borrowed from friends, I offered him the use of my record collection and asked him to use my favorite, “My heart is beating keeps on repeating”.
By the time Nikhil finished the tape, we had been dating for several weeks. One Saturday, he called and said he had a surprise for me. As I got in the car and we headed for the long drive, the music started playing in my own voice, taken from the message I once left on his answering machine that came out of the speaker: “My heart is beating….” The tape then faded into the original voice “This one is especially for you,” he said. The memory brought tears to my eyes.
Nikhil was died hard romantic; he loves giving me surprises. The one thing which was not common between us was his passion for animals whereas I feared them. On our second date he gave me two beautiful songbirds. On the next he gifted me a golden retriever, next a labrador. I told him, “You know how much I feared animals and I could not deal with their deaths, please stop giving me all these gifts.” He patiently replied, “I am passionate about them, like I adore you and could not imagine my life without you. Similarly, I cannot live without them. So, I am making you fall in love with them like you love me.”
I told him, “You are one selfish man, who wants to hold his piece of cake in both hands.”
He replied, "Not a piece of cake, darling, but kesar pista ice-cream. Want to have some? He parked in front of ice-cream parlor and told me I can satisfy my craving in this way only.” My cheeks went crimson understanding his meaning. He used to call me Kesar Pista. On another occasion on a lazy Sunday afternoon, I came out of the shower and Nikhil was in bed sleeping. He silently footed came from behind, lifted me on his shoulder and put me in bed and said, I am craving for my kesar-Pista.
The day he came to know we were expecting he decked our house with flowers. For nine months he took care of me like a baby. I was advised to have bed rest in my last trimester as my BP keeps fluctuating. One day my condition got worse. Nikhil rushed me to the hospital, the doctor immediately operated but they managed to save my life, but my child was stillborn. It was a period of gloom for both of us, for a long time we did not think of trying for another child.
The ringing of the telephone brought me back from my memories; Aria was online, her voice so full of happiness shared the news of her upcoming marriage next week in Bengaluru. I was stunned for some time on hearing that as I have not set foot in Bengaluru since that fateful day. Aria pleaded with me to come as it is such a big day for her and it would not be complete without my presence, I told her I would try my best to come and hang up.
I was in two frames of mind whether to go or not and I decided to conquer my fears and booked a ticket for an early morning flight of the same day of the wedding, My plane landed at Bangalore airport and after reaching directly at the venue I congratulated the couple and blessed them for their good future, I did all the right things but a big force was missing from this happiness, I felt so alone and all this festive atmosphere made me nostalgic and reminds me of all the happy times I spent with Nikhil in this city. After spending a fun and happy times with the old friends made me realize I have become a recluse and it’s time I went back to life , Aria asked me about my plans and when I am going back, I told her I am staying for another two days as I have some work to do and visit some old memories and not to worry on my account and enjoy her day.
I got into the rental car as I drove, my mind wandered; how could I ever make it without Nikhil- my big, strong husband whose comfortable arms held me when I cried, whose sense of humor melted my anger, and whose sense of adventure enriched both our lives. Tears stained my cheeks, but I kept driving. Damn! I passed the building well, next time.
Just as suddenly as I made the decision to drive on, I decided to go back .Reaching the main road I realized there is no exit points for who knew how many miles, I drove endlessly for many miles, mindless of where I am going and drove straight through the outskirts of the city and realized I have reached our favorite spot where we use to spent time on weekends. I parked my car and stepped out and started walking and memories of happy time flooded my mind and I could feel his presence besides me, walking hand in hand feeding tit bits to each other and just contented to be together, tears gathered in my eyes and started flowing freely and suddenly I feel moisture on my clothes and heavy rain came pouring out of nowhere as if the nature is crying and feeling my loss with me .
I took shelter inside a store as I wandered through the store. I came upon a wrought-iron and wooden bed setup displaying motif quilts, prickly cactus plants and strings of red and green peppers.
Beside the bed was a small table holding vases, delicate desert flowers and a dancing doll with a bright scarf around its neck. Unobtrusively nestled among them sat a small, old-timey wooden telephone with a carved mouthpiece and rotary dial, its receiver resting on the black prong and connected with a thin black cord. My first thought was, “how unusual. Everything else is so in place, the telephone looks out of place.” Picking it up, I lifted the receiver.
A musical tinkling began from the base of the phone. Tears filled my eyes and coursed down my cheeks. A wave of warmth swept over me as I stood sobbing, clutching the phone, oblivious of other customers walking warily around me. The tune I heard was “My heart is beating.”
Making my way towards the front to pay for my new- found treasure, there was no doubt now that I could make it. I was not alone; my Nikhil had just called to say his heart was beating for me…… and spreading a message along the way that it is time to come out of the mourning and start living again, I will remain by your side always. Love beyond the world cannot be separated by it. Death cannot kill what never dies. If winter comes, can spring be far behind?
One Year Later
I was enjoying my drink besides the pool when musical notes hummed by somebody got my attention …curious to know who was humming that song I patted the back of the man and came face to face with a smiling face and shining eyes and suddenly realized those eyes has no light but the contentment and smile on that face was enough to catch anybody’s attention.
He responded in a flirtatious smile “Hello beautiful what can I do for you?”
“How do you know I am a female and beautiful?” your perfume is floral and a person with such a warm touch is surely a beautiful person, maybe I cannot see but sense of feeling is extraordinarily strong ……. Hi, I am Sandy.
Hi Sandy, I am Rita.
That song you were humming is one of my favorites…. mine too, if you do not mind, please sing it for me and that set the pace for the evening, we started talking discussing our likes and dislikes and time flew by, I was astonished to learn I talked so much with a total stranger and enjoyed myself immensely. After the party I asked Aria about Sandy, she told me the two of them have much in common, the bomb blast which rocked your life upside down also rocked his life, and he was in the same building at the time of the blast and lost his eyesight in it.
Sandy called me that night and invited me for lunch. He invited me to his home for lunch. At first, I was reluctant to go to his house on our very first meeting, but he assured me we would be more comfortable in familiar surroundings. He had called some of his close friends also and I enjoyed the get together and his company.
We started meeting on regular basis started going together to the events, parties, friendship started blossoming, Out of the blue one day Sandy asked me to marry him, I was stunned with the turn of events in my head I know this question will arise sooner or later and now it’s time to make a decision, I asked him to give me some time to make up my mind.
Sandy took my hand in his and said, “Rita, I want to start my life afresh with you. I want to feel your face beside me every morning. I want to feel your warmth when I sleep at night. After meeting you I started to live again, I do not want to be alone anymore. Please do not be afraid to trust to love again. Give our relationship a chance sweetheart.
We got married in a civil ceremony and the music piece was being played in the background which was a favorite of both of us and held a special place in my heart “My heart is beating and keeps on repeating "I am waiting for you.”
Tears came to my eyes as I realized that the only way you can understand the real meaning and purpose of love is to be willing to pay a price. You must go out there and risk sharing it. Nothing lasts forever but it is love which stays forever.
After Forty Years
Maya and Chaya were sitting beside their grandpa and grand mom and leafing the old albums and old melodies were playing in the background. Grandma, you her still beautiful but you were a bombshell in your younger days. Do not be silly, Maya grandmom still rocks, isn’t she grandpa? Yes, darling she is still the prettiest lady in my eyes. Grandma is blushing grandpa; she looks so cute with her rosy cheeks. Let me feel her crimson cheeks and blushing face, her shy smile, and her curses which she must be mumbling under her breath.
Behave yourself old man, your granddaughters are of an impressionable age, but your romance never cease to extinguish. You are my lawfully wedded wife; I have every right to romance with you wherever and whenever I feel like it. Stop fighting you two, come let us celebrate. The whole family gathered today to celebrate our fortieth Anniversary.
Seriously, forty years have passed, it seems like I met you yesterday only when you brought back colors in my life. We sailed through challenging times and found anchor in our relationship. You made me complete sweetheart, and you gave new meaning and beginning to my life. We are blessed with such a beautiful family and a fulfilling life. Happy Anniversary Sweetheart, will you be mine again in next life. I will think about it and wait for my answer till our next Anniversary. Go easy on that cake, old man you are not young anymore. Spoilsports! You witchy old lady, I am still young.
Maya read the synopsis of her story and closed the book. This is not just a story but the extracts from a living love story of my grandparents. They both are my inspiration, the way they spend their life with so much zeal and enthusiasm. The hardships they both faced and emerged as true winners and fighters. Their love and support for each other is still solid and can be seen in their eyes. Love and mutual respect are the two key ingredients of their relationship. If I could find such a beautiful relationship for myself. It is an honor to receive first prize for my first real love story “Nothing Lasts Forever.”