I spotted her at the beach. Her eyes, fixed on the endless horizon, seemed to hold the weight of the world, reflecting an unspoken sorrow. Winds blew her long black hair, framing her delicate features against the backdrop of the setting sun. She had a small frame and she sat hugging her knees seeking solace in her own embrace. The simplicity of her attire - shorts and a fluttering white linen top only emphasised her vulnerability. I took out my canvas and began sketching. I knew that it felt intrusive, still I couldn’t shake the compulsion to immortalise her melancholic beauty. I intended to show it to her when I was done. With each stroke of my pencil, I sought to capture the subtle nuances of her expression that spoke volume without uttering a word. I was almost done by the time she got up. She looked at the sky, like she was offering a small prayer. Thinking that she was about to leave, I quickly started giving finishing touches to my work. That is exactly when it happened - I heard a loud splash. I looked up and realised that she had fallen into the sea. I was the closest to her so I left everything and jumped into the waters to save her. *** “She is lucky you got to her on time Raghav,” the doctor and his team quickly checked her vitals and administered some drugs, “We need to keep her under observation for sometime and if things seem fine, we can discharge her.” “Is there anyone we can inform Melissa?” the doctor asked. She nodded, “My grandmom. Where’s my phone?” “I have it here with me. But it is dead because it was in your pocket when you slipped,” I observed her as I said this. She simply nodded and looked away, “I don’t remember her number.” “It’s ok. I will stay with you,” I offered. “Thanks for your help. But I can manage. Where’s my wallet?” she tried looking around for it. “Sorry. That might have fallen. I didn’t realise,” I mentioned. She helplessly looked at me. “Let me help you,” I offered again. Once the doctor approved, I finished the discharge formalities. “I’ll drop you home,” I said. She sighed and nodded since she had no option. I helped her into my car, took her address and drove her home. I kept glancing sideways at her. She wanted to be left alone. So I gave her space. I stopped in front of her apartment. She felt slightly giddy so I held her hand. A servant opened the door and we entered. “Mili madam is home,” he shouted. “Where were you dear? I was worried for you. I couldn’t reach your phone also,” her grandma was wheeled to us. “Umm.. grandma I was at the sea and I slipped,” Melissa avoided eye contact, “Raghav here saved me. In fact, I need to repay him.” “Please have a seat while I get you the cash,” she added looking at me. I smiled in agreement. “Thank you dear,” grandma smiled, “Thank you for foiling her suicide attempt.” I looked up surprised. “Mili is an excellent swimmer,” she wiped a tear from her eye. Not knowing what to answer, I moved around, admiring the house. There were lots of pictures of Melissa. One picture particularly caught my eye, a picture of a young girl, with a dimpled smile. “Is this Melissa?” I pointed at the picture. “Yes, that's her, my Mili. She was probably thirteen when this was taken. That’s from some trip of hers. I slowly kept the picture back. Melissa came and handed me an envelope. “Thank you,” she said, “I will sleep a bit.” I got my cue and got up to leave. “Stay for dinner please,” grandma requested. Melissa was shocked but she simply shrugged and excused herself, “Don’t wake me up for dinner.” I sat next to grandma. We had a long conversation. “After her parents’ demise, Mili considered my husband and me as her parents but last year we lost him as well. We were trying to cope up with it but her fiancé who she was dating since college days, called off their engagement. Things have gone downhill since then,” grandma mentioned over dinner, “Mili was a happy child. But things have been too tough for her.”  My heart went out to the poor old lady. After dinner, we sat talking for some more time and then I took my leave. “Please come again,” grandma requested. I nodded. We exchanged numbers and parted ways. *** “Hi darling. It’s my birthday tomorrow. Please come. It’s a small dinner. Nothing fancy,” grandma called me. Next day, I dressed in smart casuals and went to their place. I got a bouquet for grandma. Grandma sat in the living room wearing a beautiful white Banarasee saree teamed with an elegant diamond necklace. Happy Birthday grandma. I guess I am early,” I smiled handing her the bouquet. “No. You’re on time,” she smiled. “Mili,” she beamed at her behind me. I turned around and the sight of her in red Anarkali blew my breath away. Her kohl filled eyes were mesmerising, the sound of her bangles sounded melodious to my ears. Her eyebrow shot up when she saw me. “I thought it was an intimate dinner,” she made no attempt to hide her annoyance. “Oh! I must have forgotten to inform you. Old age issues,” grandma winked. “Hi,” she forced a smile. “Hello,” I smiled like an idiot. I couldn’t keep my eyes off her. “Can we have dinner?” grandma smiled, having caught me red-handed. While we were having dinner, grandma casually asked,”So what do you do for a living?” “I paint,” I mentioned, “I also own a studio where we teach all forms of art.” Grandma nodded. “You dance right?” I looked at Melissa. Melissa was startled. I pointed at all her pictures and trophies. “Oh!” she mouthed. “I am asking because we need a dance teacher,” I added. “Oh that’s a great opportunity,” grandma smiled. “I don’t dance anymore,” Melissa glared at her. There was an uncomfortable silence during the rest of the dinner. Just as I was leaving their place I frantically started looking for my phone, “Can you call on 9876543210?” I pleaded. Melissa quickly dialled my number. “Thanks,” I grinned, “It’s an old trick but always works.” She was taken aback. I waved and left. *** “Hi,” I whatsapped her. “Hello Raghav,” she instantly replied. “Oh! So my number has been saved. Good,” I messaged. “Yes,” she replied with a smiley. “Thanks for having me over. Let me know when I can give you a tour of my studio,” I dared to ask. I could see her typing, it stopped then she typed again, “Goodnight Raghav.” I smiled and wished her night. *** Grandma kept making excuses to call me over. We met often and Melissa finally relented to join my studio. The first time she performed in front of my team, everyone applauded her. My heart swelled with pride as I saw her smile reach her eyes for the first time since I saw her at the beach that day. I often dropped her home and we spent a lot of time together at her place. “Want to grab some coffee?” I casually asked her while I was driving her home. “Stop the car!” she shouted. I stopped the car immediately, “What happened? All good?” I was genuinely concerned. “How dare you? Just because my grandma likes you, I am tolerating you. Don’t you dare think that anything is ever going to happen between us,” with this she stormed out of the car. I speechlessly stared at her. Post that, she didn’t speak with me for over a week, she always took an Uber home. Even her work was effected. The next time grandma called me home, I refused. “Mili told you something, didn’t she?” she sighed. My silence gave her the answer. “Please come,” she almost begged. I had grown really fond of her so I finally agreed. Melissa was furious when she saw me, “Do you have any shame left?” “Behave yourself Mili,” grandma chided her. They had a heated discussion and she walked out of her home. Grandma apologised to me over and over again. She started feeling uneasy and called for a glass of water. She soon collapsed and fell. I called Melissa but she disconnected my call. I immediately took her to a hospital. I kept calling Melissa, even her house helps did but all our calls were ignored. I finally texted her. “How is she now?” Melissa asked as soon as she came. “It was just stress. Not an attack thankfully,” I told her, “you can meet her.” I gave them their privacy and waited outside. “Thank you so much for getting her here. I am sorry for earlier,” Melissa was teary-eyed. Our relationship improved post that. She opened up to me about her breakup, her life in general. I offered her a shoulder everytime she cried, which was very often to be honest. Her work hadn’t come on track yet, but I was positive that it would be fine soon. Grandma, her and I often met, went out and had fun. Things finally seemed to be going good. *** “Raghav we can’t continue this way!” The staff unanimously wanted to oust Melissa, “She is so unpredictable. She comes for classes when she feels like and even when she does come, she at times leaves abruptly in the middle of the classes. We have been receiving so many complaints against her.” “Trust me, she is amazing. She is just going through a bad phase. Give her some time,” I tried reasoning. “Raghav we have toiled hard to build our brand and just for this one person, it is getting tarnished,” someone spoke up. “It’s ok. I am willing to take this risk,” I replied. “I know it’s your money and you do whatever you wish to do with it. But don’t forget our reputation is also at stake here. I don’t know what relation you two have but I can’t sacrifice my career because of her,” someone shouted. Everyone seemed to agree with her. “Give her one last chance please?” I pleaded. “We won’t let this happen for long,” someone said and with that they left me alone. I sat there, clutching my head, not knowing how to handle the situation. I knew I could not desert her no matter how much loss that would incur but I couldn’t jeopardise the careers of others who were dependent on me. Melissa came and sat next to me. She held my hand and we sat there in silence. I know she had overheard the discussion and I felt bad for not being able to shield her from that. “Let’s go grab some drinks?” she suggested. I nodded and we went straight to a bar. We ordered drinks. That's when it struck me - this was our first real date, at least in my mind it was a date. We sat there talking for long and her voice sounded musical to my ears. I would give anything to just sit there and listen to her. I was lost in her words when I noticed her tone and demeanour change. She got up and charged at someone even before I could register what was happening. I soon ran behind her. My blood started boiling as I realised what was happening. I clenched my hands, trying to breathe easy. I moved away so as not to break that person’s head. I could hear her sobbing, begging and reasoning with her ex. She confessed her love again, and pleaded with him to return to her. But he called her crazy and went away. I saw her drop on the floor like a lump. I ran to pick her up. She was howling and calling after him. I thought it best to take her away. We drove around a bit while I hoped she would calm down. But she just wouldn’t stop crying. Finally, I took her to my place. I had to almost carry her home. I held on to her while she cried her heart out. I experienced a shooting pain in my heart making it difficult to breathe. I could give anything just to receive an iota of love from her and that useless piece of shit didn’t even value it. After what looked like forever, she finally managed to calm down. I fixed a quick meal for us and we spoke at length after that. It felt good, having her at my place. She started walking around my house, admiring my work. I couldn’t help but look at her while she looked at my work. I saw her walk towards my work desk. Luckily she stopped to admire a half finished portrait. I got enough time to get up and hide her portrait. Not yet. She looked at alI the displayed work. “You are a great artist,” she mentioned. I smiled and thanked her. It soon became a regular. We preferred spending time indoors, chatting for hours, laughing, playing games, just the two of us. *** She came to me at the studio one day. She seemed quite adrift. “All good?” I was concerned. “Hmm,” she nodded. “I was supposed to get married today,” she was trying hard to not lose her composure. She seemed lost in her thoughts. I wished I could do something to ease her pain away. “Should I drop you home?” I had some work but I didn’t want to leave her alone. “Let's go to your place and have a drink. I badly need it,” she suggested. I left my work and we headed to my place, picking up some drinks on our way. She still looked in a daze. I wanted to hug her, to kiss her pain away. I sighed and looked up. “Can I have something comfortable to wear please?” she requested, “I am having difficulty breathing.” I nodded and got her a clean pair of pyjamas. My heart skipped a beat when I saw her in my clothes. I excused myself to set the table and take out some snacks and glasses. We drank in silence for a bit. We were a few glasses down. “When will you draw my portrait?” she suddenly asked. I was startled. Her eyes were almost boring into me. “You really like me right?” she asked even before I could respond. I was extremely uncomfortable. She waited for some time for my response, then she shook her head, smiled and gulped down her remaining drink. “Let me make you a nice drink,” she suggested and quickly started making a cocktail. I nodded, glad for a change of topic. While handing me my drink, her fingers brushed against mine, sending a jolt of electricity through my body. I saw her flinch, her eyes widened in fear. Our eyes locked, the air crackled with anticipation and we both felt an undeniable pull of attraction. I reached out and gently pulled her closer to me. She nestled into my embrace. I could feel her breath and the sound of her heartbeat as quick as my own. Her body was pressed against mine. I lifted her head, my fingers traced against her soft features. I leaned forward and she closed her eyes. As our lips met in a soft embrace, a rush of heat surged into my body, igniting a deep desire within me. With each kiss, I felt myself sinking deeper into the intoxicating sensation of being wanted. I felt the same urgency in her kiss. Her smell was intoxicating. I gently untied her hair, letting it fall freely down her neck. I started running my fingers through her thick locks. I held onto her small waist, her skin burning against my fingers. My hands moved upwards to her chest, tracing the contours of her body. I paused and whispered in her ears,”Love you.” She gently pulled away. Sensing her hesitation, I broke the embrace. She collected herself, fixed her hair and whispered, “Can you drop me home please?” I nodded. “I will return your pyjamas later if that’s fine,” she avoided eye contact. “Hmm,” I mumbled and grabbed my car keys. She embraced herself and looked outside the entire ride. I could see her eyes glistening. I respected her decision to be left alone and drove silently. She thanked me and rushed home as soon as we stopped outside her apartment, probably afraid I might want to kiss her goodbye. I sat for a moment clutching the driving wheel, trying to stop my hands from trembling. I tried acting cool so as to not make her uncomfortable but with her gone, I tried to calm my nerves. That night I kept resisting an urge to speak with her, all the while replaying the sweet moment we spent a while ago. I realised that Valentine’s Day was just around the corner and I wanted to do something really special for her. I stayed up all night deciding on the perfect date idea and a beautiful gift for my beautiful Melissa. I could hardly contain my excitement. She came to me at the studio the next day, “I am sorry about yesterday. It was all a mistake. I have no such feelings for you,” she handed in her resignation, “It’s best we don’t meet ever again,” she left without waiting for my response. I sat there in shock, unable to move. I had seen her feel the same emotion as me yesterday. How could it all be false? My head was throbbing, I could hardly breathe. I sat there clutching my heart, my entire life had come crashing down. I was still hopeful. I called her umpteen times, dropped her so many messages but she never replied. We hadn’t spoken for days but I did not cancel my reservations. Not now, not when I was this close. I called her on Valentine’s Day but as usual she disconnected. I resisted my urge to barge into her house, shout at her, hug her. Next day at work, I overheard my staff talking. “I went out on a date with Melissa last night. I thought Raghav and her had a thing. But clearly she doesn’t want anything to do with him. We danced, sang and had dinner. It was fun. In fact she just tagged me on her instagram story!” I immediately checked her instagram. I could take it no more. *** Dear Mili, I will be long gone by the time you see this. I know you hate the sight of me, you regret meeting me that day at the beach. But what you don’t know, is that on that fateful day, my long quest finally came to an end. An unknown force attracted me to you and only later that day, I found out the reason behind it. I didn’t want to reveal this until I was able to build that trust, until I made some space in your heart for me. I tried, I really did, but I am tired now. My childhood dream has crashed badly and I have realised some things are just fantasy. You have always been my dream girl but I guess now it’s time to wake up to reality. Let me atleast tell you a story, a story of two teenagers - Raghu and Mili based in a quaint town of Goa. They met when she had come to visit her uncle who was posted there. Yes, I am Raghu. I guess we have some connection with beaches, because even then, I first saw you on the pristine beach along the majestic Arabian Sea. I was sitting alone on the beach, letting myself soak in the warmth of the sun. I opened my eyes when I heard people squeal. I saw them running to the beach, shouting and playing carefree. I observed them, particularly noticing a cute dimpled girl. She caught me looking her way, smiled and whispered something to her friends. They all turned around to look at me. I was obviously embarrassed. I closed my eyes and cursed myself under my breath. “Hi, Mili here,” that girl - you came up to me and surprised me, “remember?” I think I mumbled something incoherently. “You want to join us?” you smiled. I was too shy. I shook my head and headed back home picking my stuff. That evening I was forced to attend someone’s anniversary and boy I was disappointed when I found out it was your uncle’s. I sat sulking in a corner and you came up to me once again, “Come join us.” This time, you didn’t wait for my response. Instead, you dragged me along and introduced me to your cousins and friends. I was always considered a weirdo and you were one of the firsts to make me feel welcome. We met again at the beach, every day since that day. We played, swam and had fun. You came unannounced to my house one day, just like you came unannounced into my life. You picked up my sketches. I had a strange fluttering feeling in my stomach when I saw your eyes light up seeing my work, hearing your words of admiration. “You should become a painter when you grow up. I am going to be a dancer,” you casually announced. I was overjoyed and took that as an order. I spent countless hours drawing a picture for you. I could imagine the look on your face when you would see it, the ways your eyes would light up. You would then raise your eyebrows for a few seconds before giving that flattering smile of yours. I finished it, signed it and added today’s date because you told me that’s how big painters do it. I hesitated a little then added a small note below. I ran straight to your house to give it to you. I saw a huge crowd outside your house. I was confused until I overheard someone say that your parents passed away in an accident. Amidst the chaos, my eyes were searching just for you. The sketch lay forgotten in my pocket. I spotted you in a corner, staring blankly into space. I ran to you wanting to say so much and yet nothing came out of my mouth. You noticed me and immediately hugged me, the first time you ever did. You held onto me and cried your heart out. My heart broke into a million little pieces seeing the state of you. That day, we spoke so much without uttering a single word. When you finally let go of me, your eyes were bloodshot, you could hardly breathe. You looked so frail, so broken, like a lost puppy. That day, as a kid, I made a promise to myself to never let you cry again. But what did I know? I was after all just a kid. Next day, you left for Mumbai without saying goodbye and before long, your uncle also relocated. I worked really hard, fought with my parents to become a painter and finally landed in Mumbai. In the vast sea of people, I kept looking for you. I had no idea where you stayed. Heck! I didn’t even know your formal name. It was an impossible task to locate you but who could explain to my stupid heart! Slowly, I made Mumbai my home, set up my work and business here but I never stopped looking for you. I even tried looking for you online but without your actual name, even that was futile. Then one day, I noticed you at the beach and I didn’t know why I was attracted to you. I had not felt such an attraction towards anybody. I was confused, but then at your place, I saw your childhood picture and realised you were my Mili. After that, like a fool, I tried making some space in your heart. You kept pushing me away. But I was hopelessly in love with you, I still am and always will be. But now I know I cannot go on like this. I respect your decision. I never wanted to compel you to spend time with me, to like me. It would have been easier had I introduced myself that day itself. Grandma knew and she was hopeful that I could help bring back the old Mili but I failed miserably at it. I only managed to push her further away. I don’t have the courage to face her so please tell her I am leaving Mumbai for good. While I did achieve a name here and my business flourished, the main reason why I came here didn’t work out. In the package, there is a framed portrait of yours, the first one I made. Love, Raghu Melissa had a lump in her throat, the floodgate of tears opened. With trembling hands she opened the packet to see a picture of her teenage self from Goa dated 29/02/2012. Below it, there was a neatly written note: I love you. *** I was sitting on the beach, the place where I saw her for the first time ever. I could vividly recall the first time I saw her. I often replayed this over and over in my head. I would often fantasise about our life together here as a couple. Ironically, it was on this exact day when I had made a promise to myself so many years ago to never let her cry again, it was also the day I had made the first sketch of her and planned to propose to her. But today, here I was crying because of all the pain she gave me. I was glad this day didn’t come every year, because I definitely won’t be missing it, I didn’t want to be reminded of a broken promise and an unfulfilled dream every single year. I closed my eyes trying to calm myself. A noise behind me made me turn around. Like always, she came unexpectedly. She smiled and sat next to me. “You should become an author,” she announced. I looked at her, a thousand thoughts running through my mind. She leaned closer to me and nuzzled my nose with hers. She looked up at me and locked my lips with hers, putting her entire weight on me. I lost balance and we both rolled on the sand. We laughed like crazy. “I love you too idiot!” she pulled me closer, we kissed, a kiss that seemed to last forever.